Creative Economic Policies

How to deal with the shrinking economy?

1) Rusty's Production Clinic: I will make it my mission to increase Singapore's fertility rates.

2) Ban condoms. LOL

How to deal with the aging population?

1) Something I read on a blog a few days ago - Mercy Killings.

The Turkish Girl that couldn't stop talking

In our EDA class there's this girl, who on first sight isn't bad looking, but once she opens her mouth her looks go down the drain. In the thickest european accent ever to be heard on this planet, she talks on and on and no one really know what she's saying. Even prof has to ask her to repeat a couple of times to figure out what the hell is going on. It would be much more productive if she wrote down whatever she had to say on the board in stead of speaking.

I could see no reason that anyone would want to look or talk to her, especially that she sits behind us and why strain our neck when we can be playing games on our comp right?

So it turned out Chinker gave us a reason to turn our heads.

Chinker noticed that she always leans forward when she speaks so the other day he told Daren to turn around. Why? To look at her cleavage.

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA

Who has the biggest Dong?

Some of my friends are taking finance with prof Hong Dong. So his name (Dong in particular) has inspired us to make many "dong" related jokes such as:

"I'm taking Finance under a dong"

So the other day another friend comes to us and she's like "omg i saw my fling yesterday ... its so awkard." So we asked her what defines a fling. And she said "A small thing" - so obviously being guys we automatically took it in a sexual way. Seconds later Daren started asking everyone:

"Do you have a fling or a dong?"
one response: "I have a Ding"

LOL wth.

In the end we came up with the Order of the Dongs: Fling < Ding < Dong < Schlong < Flong (foot long)

Shit face - 2

After 10th grade, Shit face moved out of Kuala Lumpur and our lives and into the lives of some other very unfortunate students.

She become uglier and bitchier and kept on shitting. I honestly believe that half the world's poverty exists because of her. They look at her ugliness and wonder if becoming rich will make them ugly like that so they just give up and live their lives in their own content state.

Anyway, no one heard about Shit face until 2 months ago when she randomly became the roommate of an extremely unlucky friend of mine.

This morning she told me that Shit face stole her underwear and was parading around the house in it. First of all, THATS AN IMAGE I WANT TO GET OUT OF MY MIND. Second of all, WHO THE HELL WEARS OTHER PEOPLE'S UNDERWEAR??

So obviously my friend was disturbed. After all, wearing used underwear is as good as throwing away someone else's underwear. So I told my friend to scold Shit face:

Sur Rusty says:
"nisha you're full of shit"
Sur Rusty says:
is that why you're borrowing grace's underwear?
Sur Rusty says:
cause yours are full of shit too?
Bones פ says:
HAHAHAHAHHHHAHA

But honestly ... what would you do if this happens to you and someone else "borrows" your underwear without asking and you don't have a lock or key to your door?

Shit face

One day we boys were sitting and having our lunch when the ugliest and bitchiest girl in our school was walking past our table talking to her loyal side kick. We managed to hear the following part of their conversation and then burst out laughing:

Ugly bitch: I need to take a massive shit. My stomach is so messed up.

Disgusting man. But thats not even half as bad as what happens 10 minutes later when Ugly Bitch is walking back.

Ugly bitch: You should have seen it, it was green and big fat lumps and they kept falling and falling.
Ugly bitch's sidekick: Really?
Ugly bitch: Yeah you should have seen it.

I think its quite fair to say none of us finished our lunch that day. The story soon spread and I think if she was the last female on earth no one would have sex with her (even the rabbits and they do it all day.)

From then on we she was called "Shit face"